Hello friends! Happy Friday! I hope you had a great week and are able to do something fun and life-giving this weekend 🙂
Ok, there is a lot to discuss in these four chapters so let’s dive right in!
Chapter 9: Why Does Rejection Hurt So Much?
*Rejection can seem that we are set aside but Lysa suggests that this can actually be God setting us apart. What is the difference between the two? How is being set apart a good thing?
*Lysa shares three gifts that come from rejection:
- the gift of being made less
- the gift of being lonely
- the gift of silence
Have you ever experienced these gifts in your life? Did you consider them gifts at the time?
*The shifting of the word “forgiving” to “for giving” can completely alter the way we think about rejection. How can you put this shift into practice?
Chapter 10: Her Success Does Not Threaten Mine
*Do you find yourself thinking “stinky thoughts”? Do you feel that this stinky way of thinking affects those around you and the atmosphere you bring with you?
*Compare and contract scarcity mentality vs. an abundance mentality. Where do these different mentalities lead? Why should we choose an abundance mentality?
*How do you starve scarcity thinking? How can you live loved in the midst of seeing others receive what you have been praying for, desiring, or hoping for?
Chapter 11: Ten Things You Must Remember When Rejected
*“The Enemy loves to take our rejection and twist it into raw, irrational fear that God really doesn’t have a good plan for us” (pg. 129). Have you seen this to be true in your life?
*Thinking back on you life can you find a time where a practical solution felt like a rejection? Did that feeling of rejection change over time?
*Lysa lists ten things we must remember when rejection comes our way. They are:
- One rejection is not a projection of future failures
- Rejection doesn’t label you
- This could be an invitation to live in expectation of something else
- There is usually some element of protection wrapped in every rejection
- It’s good to ask the “What” questions but less helpful to ask “why”
- Don’t hash, bash, or trash on the Internet. Remember the Internet never forgets
- There’s much more to you than the part that was rejected
- What one person sees as a liability, another might see as a wonderful asset
- This is a short-term setback, not a permanent condition
- Don’t let this heartbreak destroy you. Let this breaking actually be the making of you. Let God use it in ways to make you stronger and take you further.
Which of these resonated with you the most?
Chapter 12: The Enemy’s Plan Against You
*Lysa shares a scary story of having a lion roaring at her tent door in Africa. She compares this to how our Enemy is “like a roaring lion looking to devour us.” What was the reason she gave for having lost in her battle with the lion? How does this relate to our own battle with the Enemy?
*”Where we pay attention matters more than we know” (pg. 158). What are you paying attention to? Why does it matter so much? How can you fix your thoughts on God?
*“The Devil is vicious but he is not victorious. And you, my friend, have everything you need to defeat him” (Pg. ). Do you believe this to be true? How does knowing we can defeat the Devil change the way we fight against him?
Scripture of the Week
Psalm 73:25-26
Psalm 34:18
Philippians 2:4
Prayer of the Week
Father God, thank You for the gifts You give us even in the difficult times. Help us to keep our eyes and minds fixed on You. We know we have an Enemy that looks to destroy us and we also know he is a defeated foe. Help us to fight in Your strength and not give him a foothold. When we feel rejected we are especially vulnerable. Would You help and encourage us in those moments? Please remind us You have a good plan for our lives and You will never abandon us. You don’t set us aside, but rather You set us apart. Help us to put our trust in You and walk with You in obedience. Thank You for being a God who is truth and love. In Jesus’ Name, Amen
For Next Week
Finish “Uninvited” by reading chapters 13 – 16
What happens when you realize you’ve let the idea of you being “set apart” go to your head, making it all about you? Welcome to my world circa 2020.
I’ve always associated “set apart” with being holy, and while I’ve never considered myself to be so, in 2020 I was beginning to learn just how much I really thought of myself…too much. Like. A. Lot. Like. A. Ton.
So today, I was very surprised to learn what the Hebrew word for holy actually means. “Kodesh” comes from the root word “Kadash” which means to be set apart for a specific purpose; something that is “set apart” from everything else to do a job. Yes, there are times throughout Scripture when features of moral righteousness or Godly devotion are associated with “holy” people, but having a specific purpose is the main focus of the word – not being good, righteous, or pure.
I’ve mentioned a few times in previous posts that God’s been working with and in me regarding what I call a “grace complex.” My incorrect view of thinking – for sadly a very long time – has been that 1) somehow I’ve been set apart due to “my” goodness, righteousness, or purity and 2) because of “who I am” I deserve to have life go a certain way.
That mentality all came to a screeching halt in 2020 when life, as I knew it not only got real and scary very fast, but also truly out of my control. In those moments I had to come to terms with two things in particular: who I considered God to be and who I considered myself to be. By God’s grace, I realized I wasn’t seeing either one correctly. I thought since I had done/was doing what I ought to do – and felt very pleased with myself mind you because of this – God should be pleased with me and not allow certain things in my life to occur.
The gift of being made less is a hard pill to swallow. The thing is though, that even with my pompous attitude, God let me know He didn’t see me as less. As Paul writes, “My (God’s) grace is sufficient for you, for My (God’s) power is made perfect in weakness. Therefore I will boast all the more gladly of my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ may rest upon me.”
(2 Corinthians 12:9) And as the author points out: “We are supposed to maximize God, which keeps our weaknesses in perspective.” (Page 119).
I don’t like to be weak…or wrong. I like to think I’m strong and right, and destined for strong, right things. I like to think I’m set apart, not set aside. But it’s in the set aside – or sometimes Time Out sessions as I like to call many of my experiences – that God shapes us into who He created us to be and what He created us to do.
Layered beneath my “obsession with goodness” mentality was a desperate desire to be accepted regardless of how great I looked on paper. Thankfully, God’s not looking at my resume – He’s looking at my heart and wanting to make it more like His.
We’re all rough around the edges and some of those edges are sharp. But “God isn’t afraid of your sharp edges that may seem quite risky to others. He doesn’t pull back. He pulls you close.” (Page 143)
We don’t have to try to impress Him; He’s not drawing us to Himself based on what we do or don’t do. God is calling us to be set apart for Him and He has chosen purposes specifically for each of us. We don’t have to wonder if His plans are good because He is good, righteous, and pure. “God is utterly, utterly reliable.” (Page 123) I want to let that sink in and live loved out of that truth.