Happy Friday! Can you believe it’s our last week in “Keep Showing Up”?! I hope you have enjoyed the book and are encouraged to keep showing up for your marriage!
Chapter 8: The Setup for Success
*The author writes, “Every marriage is a unique blend of awesome and awful” (pg. 173). Do you tend to focus on the awesome or the awful? How can the awful times be reframed to drive you closer to Him?
*Karen suggests that each marriage needs spotters: friends who can catch you when you fall and speak up when you start to wobble. Do you have such spotters in your life? If not, what is one way you can begin to build a friendship?
Chapter 9: Never Stop Starting Over
*The author states that “showing up is half the battle” and the whole battle is the Lord’s (pg. 210). Does this bring comfort to you to know that God is fighting with you for your marriage?
*On pages 207-208, Karen discusses the idea of continuing on in our marriage because of Jesus- because He said so. Does this idea create a sense of duty/obligation for you? Or is this a helpful thought?
*“It is important to make sure God is the one changing us and not the world.” Are you allowing God to change you through the various life seasons that you experience?
Scriptures of the Week
“Faithful are the wounds of a friend…” Proverbs 27:6
“Master,” Simon replied, “we worked hard all last night and didn’t catch a thing. But if you say so, I’ll let the nets down again.” Luke 5:5
“Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you.” Ephesians 4:32
Prayer of the Week
Father God, Thank You that the battle belongs to You. Help us to keep showing up for duty, to keep loving and forgiving, showing grace and allowing You to renovate our hearts. May our marriages be ones that preach the gospel well and glorify You. Give us strength and encouragement when it’s difficult and bring friends into our lives that can help us when we wobble. Thank You for listening to our prayers and for teaching us all that You would have us to learn to be more like Jesus. Thank You all the many blessings marriage brings and help us to keep eyes wide open to them. In Jesus’ Name, Amen
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What a blessing this book has been! đ€
Lately, God has been repeating the phrase âshow upâ in many areas of my life….itâs so hard to do, but so important!
I think one reason itâs so hard is because I tend to focus on the awful rather than the awesome – I get stuck replaying situations that have occurred and assume the worst the next time around (probably assuming there will even be a next time is so horrible in itself haha đ). If I stop and try to reframe these moments as âawe-filled timesâ (Page 176), I think Iâd not only extend more grace but also grow.
Fortunately, I have a few spotters in my life that help me stay sane and show me tough love. By having honest conversations, weâre able to pour into each other, peel back the layers, and begin to process the situations weâre dealing with.
Fighting for oneâs marriage sucks a lot of the time because change takes time…but not fighting for it is worse. Knowing that God is fighting with me in (and for) my marriage helps me relieve a lot of the pressure I have felt to âfix itâ. Godâs the One who heals and He may not only need to heal issues within my husband but also within me. Itâs not my responsibility to fix it – it is my responsibility to bring the issues to Him and obey accordingly.
Likewise, doing something âbecause Jesus said soâ is very powerful in relation to continuing in marriage because He cannot steer us wrong. He can truly and always be trusted; we will not fail us when we listen to Him. We may not like what He wants us to do, but that is because we only see our side of it at that specific moment – He sees the entire picture.
I completely agree it comes down to choosing to let God change us through various life seasons. There will be change, so thatâs the first piece weâve got to accept. I am not good at letting God change me – more often I ask God to change my husband and others. đŹ Change takes work, so automatically that doesnât sound fun. đ€Ș But the longer I fight myself and God, the harder it usually gets for me. Itâs definitely a work in progress and Iâm trying to release my control and let God be in charge.
A lot of times it seems that we think change is going to not only be a sacrifice in the moment but a continual sacrifice. Lately I’ve been wondering why my mind doesn’t frame change as a good thing. Maybe because it is work, like you said, but I guess we just need to have the long view about it and realize it might get easier actually. If we continue to let God work in and through us, we will eventually see the growth!
I really really love that you said that Jesus will not steer us wrong! I keep thinking on that – so great. I need to get better at believing this!