Hello friends! Excited to discuss this week’s questions with you! There was a lot to unpack in such a short amount of reading! So let’s get right to it. Here are this week’s questions:
Introduction
*”You are not enough.” How does reading this statement make you feel? Why do you think it would be dangerous for us to be told otherwise?
*The author addresses 5 common myths we are constantly fed in the culture of self-love:
- You are enough.
- You determine your truth.
- You’re perfect the way you are.
- You’re entitled to your dreams.
- You can’t love others until you love yourself.
Which of these 5 myths resonated most with you? Why? How do you encounter it in your life?
Myth 1: You Are Enough
*How do you view the culture of self-love? Do you believe it to be toxic? Have you bought into this culture? Does it bring you happiness or leave you feeling unsatisfied?
*Allie writes that the Cult of Self-Affirmation and Christianity cannot coincide. Do you believe this to be true? Why or why not? What are some real-life examples of how the two contrast?
*“If we worship the god of self, we will sacrifice anything on its altar to satisfy its demands. And the god of self is relentlessly demanding” ( pg. 47). Do you see this to be true in your own life? In culture today? Give some examples that you consider to be “worship of the god of self” (i.e. selfie obsession, etc.).
Scriptures of the Week
2 Corinthian 5:17
Matthew 11:30
Psalm 61:2
Prayer of the Week
Father God, Thank You for creating each one of us so uniquely and for loving us so well. We long to worship You and You alone, not ourselves. Help us to give up the idea that we can do it all on our own and that we are enough. Help us to know that it is only in You that we can live and breathe and do anything at all – and that’s a good thing! Would You help us to trade the heavy burden for Your light burden? We don’t need to be caught in the cycle of self-affirmation and self- love because it won’t heal us. Lead us to the Rock that is higher than we are and help us to rest there. In Jesus’ Name, Amen
For Next Week
*Read Myth #2 & Myth #3
“You are enough.” and other self-motivating mantras have been ingrained in my brain ever since I can remember. I always thought the phrase “the sky’s your limit” sounded a bit strange and wasn’t quite sure how the world could be my oyster, but knew I could be all I could be, and then some…
And. Then. I. Grew. Up. 🙃
When things “suddenly” weren’t going my way, I simply believed I hadn’t done something right – or someone else hadn’t done something right because everything was supposed to work out, right?!
“You are not enough.” isn’t popular, encouraging, or fun…but it’s the truth and I’m SO glad this author finally says it! 😆
It’s way too easy to get caught up in the whirlwind of actually believing we are enough for everything we encounter; however, it’s a slippery slope once these thoughts invade our minds because we eventually hit a wall, embrace denial for a time, and get stuck running like a hamster (autopilot mode) on the wheel of life in all areas: emotionally, mentally, physically, socially, and worst of all, spiritually.
Why do we do this to ourselves?! For me, it’s because I’ve bought into the lies that 1) I’m perfect the way I am and 2) I’m entitled to my dreams.
One of my favorite songs is “Don’t Stop Believing” by Journey. The overall message is hope and that there really is something to believe in, so don’t stop.
If we believe we’re enough though, we’re only hurting ourselves by continuing with this mentality because we’re ironically never satisfied.
Self-love being a crucial part of the enough factor is very toxic because, as the author mentions, is relentlessly demanding. I’ve fallen into this more times than I care to admit particularly with self-care maintenance. Whether it’s a manicure, reading a book, organizing my closet, or going to the thrift store, I’ve set these things on a pedestal because – let’s be honest – I’ve put myself on a pedestal…idolizing myself and declaring I deserve these things. It starts out simple and so scary how intentions can become so wrong! The god of self entangles and eventually begins eating away at us as well.
If we self-affirm, we only continue down the rabbit hole. Self-affirmation puts us at the center while Christianity put Christ at the center; they don’t match up. Christ is the only one who can truly affirm us, as He is the Truth, and it is Him we need to follow.
I think you hit the nail on the head: Self-affirmation puts us at the center while Christianity puts Christ at the center. I think this is the main idea that we often get wrong- we think of ourself so much and forget that it’s about Christ. He should be the one we are pouring our lives out for and glorifying. Too often I get caught up in a “what about me?” mentality. I think that trust is needed to know that God will meet us where we’re at. So we don’t have to be enough but lean on His enoughness. It was a huge shocker for me that I’m not entitled to “all the things” and that life doesn’t just go the way you want because you’re so special or wonderful. I’ve been struggling with the abundant life we’re promised vs. the life of denial of self that we’re told to live. I think when we pull our focus from Jesus and put it on the world we get so scrambled and confused and we can’t live with one foot in the world and one in Christ. It’s just going to have to be a choice to live in Him at all times and in all things. We have to live with Him in our heart with no other rivals there – including ourself.