Hospitality doesn’t really come naturally for me. Just gonna get that out there right now. I’m an introvert and a lot of social activity doesn’t come naturally. I really have to work at it and most of the time can only handle it in small doses. My sister and I have a joke that we only have friends because an extrovert decided to adopt us! But, as I’ve been thinking about the idea of hospitality I’ve been challenged to find what is at the heart of this command God gives us. As we are coming into this season of lots of family gatherings, dinners around the table, homes being opened and people gathered inside I’ve wondered how do we actually practice hospitality? And is it more about the why behind it, than it is the how?

Romans 12 gives us a lot to consider. I don’t believe it is coincidence that in the beginning of the chapter Paul is telling us to be a living sacrifice (v.1). He then moves on to urging us not to conform to the world, then to service and using our gifts cheerfully and diligently, and then he moves on to love.

“Love must be sincere. Hate what is evil; cling to what is good. Be devoted to one another in love. Honor one another above yourselves. Never be lacking in zeal, but keep your spiritual fervor, serving the Lord. Be joyful in hope, patient in affliction, faithful in prayer. Share with the Lord’s people who are in need. Practice hospitality.” Romans 12:9-13

Loving others leads to putting their needs above our own, and then sharing with them. So it seems that our hearts are changed first, we offer our lives to God, and then we practice that offering. We love. We give. We see needs and we meet them. We share and in doing so, we serve the Lord. 

Nothing in these verses says anything about how nice our home has to look in order for us to share a meal or meet a need. Nothing tells me that I have to be extroverted or extremely good at small talk. I don’t see anything that says that I should be sitting in the corner, idling scrolling through social media on my phone so I don’t have to actually engage with anyone in the room.

Underneath it all- the invitations for dinner, the “How are you?” that is asked, the chairs about the table-it is all about love. That’s the heart of it all. Love for God- and love for His people. His people. We love God and therefore His people become our people. Almost four years ago, my husband and I got married. My family became his family and his family became mine. But it was even before our wedding day that we began to talk to each other’s families, to get to know each other, because we loved one another and because we were going to create this union that one day would make us all one family. It is God that makes all of us one family and those He loves should be important to us as well. Shouldn’t we desire to love those whom God loves?

Sincere love keeps the Enemy out of our midst and keeps disagreements and arguments at bay. It is so important that as believers we be real in our love for people! We can’t greet them with big smiles and hugs at church and then talk about them behind their backs. We can’t say, “I’ll pray for you” when they have a need and then withhold what we could give to provide that need. We don’t need to just be nice but we need to really practice kindness and love. 1 Peter 4:8-9 tells us,

“Above all, love each other deeply, because love covers a multitude of sins. Offer hospitality to one another without grumbling.” 1 Peter 4:8-9 

In some versions, it even says cheerfully! It’s that part, the not grumbling and being cheerful instead, that gets to me. I can do things but in my head I am a grumble monster! That’s not what God wants. He desires me to have that sincere love so that I can do these things without having that grumbling so that I can remember that I need help and I need love and forgiveness, too.

When we can provide, help, and serve others without complaining about all that we are doing or asking why we have to do anything at all, then I think we are on our way to truly practicing the sort of hospitality God wants from us.

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Join me on Wednesday as we talk about some practical ways to practice hospitality!