One thought on “Book Club – “Dance, Stand, Run” (Week Two)”

1. 

   For the most part, I would say I’m a pretty easy-going person. Yes, I’m coming to terms with my people-pleasing characteristics, but overall, I’m pretty chill. And yet something strikes a nerve within me when justice is seemingly not given to people who are so clearly (by moral standards – and yes, I’ll admit, sometimes solely in my opinion) wrong. I! Can’t! Stand! It!
   I think the first time I experienced this outrage was right after college when an outpouring of love and support was given to a girl I knew who had gotten pregnant. Before I continue, may I just say I’m not proud of having felt like this, and in a lot of ways am still working through my right response to this and other situations.
   Ok, actually, I think a little backstory is needed: I grew up being taught to be a “good girl,” and that if you were one, you’d succeed in life. Period. Don’t cut corners; don’t do drugs; don’t get pregnant and you won’t have to worry about skipping on life, or periods…see what I did there? 😉
   This was SO ingrained in me; I didn’t even really know I had these non-negotiable-like feelings so strongly within me until situations would present themselves and I involuntarily bubbled over with intense emotions. As Jess mentioned, we have to question the “why” of our rhythms and give an honest answer as to what we do, what we say, and how we think.
   Regarding my example that caused me to be so critical and possess so much frustration, I had to take a step back and dissect and analyze my reaction. For the record, I didn’t do this instantly; it took years for me to face myself and wrestle with my emotions. It took even longer for me to admit I could be in the wrong. From this week’s reading though, it’s so clear looking at that situation: I was a Jonah.
   “[R]espond to the call of holiness by looking at our own lives.” (Page 92) Can I say something without sounding arrogant? I believe a lot of the time those who haven’t experienced as much difficulty as others in life are ignorant – and not in the “choosing to turn a blind eye to what’s going on” sort of way, though that can definitely be a part of it – but an actual unawareness or not knowing of what those situations look like. I know, that sounds obvious and dumb and matter-of-fact. But there is truth to the phrase, “You don’t know what you don’t know.” In this example, I didn’t know anything about having to deal with any of the choices associated with getting pregnant. Honestly, I’m sure neither did the girl, but she had to deal with it and figure it out…I didn’t. So why was I so concerned? I don’t say this to be mean. I had to ask these type of questions to get to the root of “my” issue.
   It’s so interesting to me that in order to get over ourselves, we have to get under ourselves. We have to let the Holy Spirit dig deeply and shine a light on what’s strongly rooted within us. What did God reveal to me about myself regarding this situation? That playing the part of looking good and seemingly having it altogether or even being or doing good by my own or this world’s standards doesn’t cut it. That sadly, I liked my standard of measurement more than His.
   Sometimes I still do. I don’t, really…but you know what I mean. Our way of thinking seems easier and more tangible; it seems to hold people accountable and responsible right way, and be justified.
   “Therefore, since we have been justified through faith, we have peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ.” (Romans 5:1) This is why we need to stay in our lanes and worry about our own lives!? If we don’t believe God is enough for us, if we don’t accept Jesus’ imputed righteousness and amazing grace upon us as being adequate, then we need to check ourselves.
   Yes, there is the wrestling between our sin and the Spirit within us. But there comes a point where we have to either lay ourselves down and let Him lead us, or reject Him and all He offers.
   Dismantling pride may take a lifetime to overcome, but we can overcome through Christ; He’s already overcome so we’re in good company. Being humble is hard; being humiliated isn’t fun. But I agree with Jess’ suggestion to “take humility all the way” (Page 91) Humility doesn’t mean settling or compromising one’s values; it’s valuing yourself rightly. When I dissected my reasoning behind my crazy emotions, the Spirit also showed me how I had the “we/us” vs. “they/them” mentality. It’s shocking how this can be applied to practically everything. It’s the: “We are better because we do, think this, and they are worse because they do, think that” mindset. It’s divisive and harmful and wrong.
   This doesn’t mean we throw out absolute truth and morality and make everything relative. There is still right and wrong. But it’s based on God’s standards, not ours. We, as humans, all fall into the same sinful category, no matter how many blunder rungs we have on our sin ladder. And for those of us who maybe don’t have as many…do we really want more?! We don’t get badges for the sin we’ve done – and as for difficult situations that have happened in our lives? Some of those things are on us (even partially) while others are not. Some things have simply and sadly happened to us – and that’s a topic for another day. But through it all, God loves us, values us, sees us, knows us, and wants to have a relationship with each one of us. He humbled Himself and made a way, being The Way, for us to get to Him.
   Life isn’t perfect. We have insanely rooted issues we struggle with and will most likely continue to struggle with. Are we willing to let the Spirit work in and through us? Are we willing to stop talking about how “unholy they are” and recognize how unholy we are, how much we need Christ’s holiness, how much we need His grace? We can’t get there – to perfection – on our own, ever. We already have the perfect example in Jesus. Let’s focus on Him so we can learn how to act out our holiness and extend grace, first to ourselves and then to others.

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